The crappy part of the job.

Today Mike and I have to take away some of our children's innocence.  That's not quite the right word.  Today I have to force real life on them? I don't know what to call it, but I know that I don't like it.

Mike's aunt is dying.  The cancer could not be eradicated and it's time.  She is only 55 years old and it's devestating.  My kids know a bit about death, but it's not been this close before.  They know Aunt Barbara has cancer.  They know she had chemo and lost her hair and then she had radiation.  We explained a bit about how cancer works and how the medicine to fight it is so aggressive and we can only be around Aunt Barabar when we are absolutely healthy.  But that's when we stopped talking about it.  When she tried one more round of chemo only to have the dcotors declare it unbeatable; we didn't talk about it.  When the doctors gave her less than 2 months to live - and that is now down to about a week; we didn't say a word.

It's hard enough for Mike and I to manage our own feelings about this.  Everyone has a different way of dealing with death.  No one is right and no one is wrong.  Mike and I have different beliefs about death and the possibility of an afterlife.

So today, we will sit down with our children and explain to them that their Aunt Barbara is dying.  That their grandma will be coming in town to say good bye to her only sister.  That is is okay to be sad and upset and that there aren't any answers as to why this happens.

Today sucks.  Sometimes being a parent really blows.

Comments

[LaLa]

Ughhhh; I get it. They are always with us in our memories of them and our unending love for them. Peace be with all of you.

[Farrell]

I'm so sorry. What kind of Cancer does Barbara have? My heart goes out to you guys.

[Patricia C.]

The only thing you can do in these situations is to be honest and direct. It sounds like that's exactly what you are doing. It's an important lesson and a part of life. Hang in there, Mama.

[Michelle Linhardt]

So sorry to hear she's not gotten any better. You are amazing parents and I'm sure you did a great job at a really hard conversation. Prayers for comfort for you and the kids.